Disappointing...

I had to back out of a job interview today, a second job interview for a job that I would have been really good at. I was in for a knitting teacher now that might not seem like a big deal but it was to me. I have been working so hard trying to get things ready to show them tomorrow, to hard. My tendinitis has got me bad my fingers are swollen and huge I couldn't even change a diaper, even typing hurts but I'm worried if I don't write it down that I will collapse into tears. I'm so disappointed. When it came right down to it this job was to much of a risk. I would be doing to much to my hands and wouldn't be able to do anything at school and right now that has to come first.My hubby suggested its time to start listening to my body and as much as I hated to admit it I think he is right. I just hate feeling like I can't seem to get it right. I have to go see an orthopedic doctor which will be good just to see what can be done. But I would have been so good at that job its just hard not to be frustrated and disappointed in myself. I....... don't even know where to go from here this chugging along is getting old.
When does it all become worth it?